Don't Follow the Yellow Brick Road

We all know the saying “Follow the yellow brick road” from the Wizard of oz.  I can’t help it…”Follow, follow, follow, follow, follow the yellow brick road”.
Well the idea of following a path without any idea of where you are going is nonsense.  Also “The blind leading the blind” comes to mind. And we all know that when Dorothy and crew wound up at the Wizard’s door he did not have all the answers.  The better answers, about each of their directions in life, came from the support and or confrontation between Dorothy, the lion, the scarecrow, the tin man, the good and bad witch, and let’s not forget the munchkins.  Ultimately each of them individually figured out their own weaknesses and strengths and their golden path, not the yellow one.

The most profound and usually correct answers, for every life challenge we face, are all stored within each one of us. Test it out. When you are relaxed ask yourself a question to something you have been pondering. Am I in the correct relationship? The answer will be there inside you. You will hear a yes or no answer coming from inside you. Am I in the correct job? A yes or no will resound. You can even go further and ask why. Answers will come from your inner voice!

People are out there in force telling themselves and everyone else what they need to do or what they should do or what they could do, but do you or anyone else really know what is best for you, without identifying what you truly want in life? Have you thought about what you truly value in life? Make a list of what you value most in life now. I guarantee you it is not the values of your past.  Check in with your present self and figure it out. Past values may have been socialization, lots of sex, parties, clear skin, being popular. Now it may be time to read a good book, leisure time, tight skin, gardening, getting together with close friends and or family, your kids accomplishments. Depending on what stage of life you are in the value system will change. Being clear on your values will help you set life goals. Having life goals are important if you want to get on the golden path!

The beginning of change is to identify what is not working for you in the present. Ask yourself what part of life are you not enjoying. What makes you feel uugh? What feels overwhelming, exhausting or depressing? Decide how to decrease those aspects of your life immediately. If carting the kids around makes you feel degraded as if you are a bus driver, look for a car pool, if it is cooking find a neighbor who loves to cook, and trade a task that you enjoy such as doing hair or makeup for her, or babysitting for her. I would gladly cook for a neighbor if she would pet sit my chihuahua child so I could spend more time working or traveling without the guilt of leaving the little guy alone. Let’s say you abhor gardening and your friend loves it, but she can’t stand shopping by herself, or doesn’t have the stylist talents that you have. Exchange the gardening for personal shopper services.

There was a very famous therapist named Virginia Satir who was a master at group therapy. Virigina Satir’s greatest talent was connecting people to people and creating support systems for her clients. She would have a group and would find out one of them could sew, another stayed home with a child, another was a carpenter. Connecting how each group member would help and support another towards their dream was an amazing talent Virginia Satir possessed. Virginia found that the greatest social dilemma was not having enough support from family, friends or neighbors. People became too proud to ask for help. Let’s face it many of us live across the country from our relatives, we don’t live in ethnic, cultural neighborhoods any longer, we have lost our physical connections to friends and family. Neighbors tend to drive into the garage and close the door behind.

Reach out and touch your neighbor. They really do most likely like the camaraderie and could use the company and some help from you. Move closer to family if they are supportive, go to support groups and create links and  networks to help you on your path of life. Okay here it comes….”people, people who need people are the luckiest people in the world”. Hum along!

Organize your life and live an organized living situation, get organized by following what you dream about. Add-friendly ways to organize your life by creating neighborhood barbecues, potlucks and get-togethers. Organize your mind and figure out what you value.